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Thursday, August 14, 2003

 

Dark Days Dept., the Fair and Balanced Way*



Things I've been doing with the ample electricity in my Hollywood compound since discovering that much of the East Coast has been plunged into darkness by an inexplicable blackout:

--getting my life-scale replica Electric Parade out of storage and making my yard the happiest place on earth
--breaking off the "Power Saver" switch on my robot bartender
--blender races
--having sweaty relations with Jennifer Love Hewitt underneath an array of sunlamps
--turning on and off my air conditioner to observe the ebb and flow of my nipples
--trying to unshit myself after finding out the blackout wasn't terror-related
--making fun of "Gigli"
--doing my part in the effort to create a militia of "blackout bastards" in nine months even thought the power's on in LA


[*In solidarity with another Neal Pollack and Blah3-led internet crusade, I'm doing my inestimably huge part in putting a finger in the eye of the litigious News Corp for suing Al Franken for satirizing their favorite slogan.]



About this site

This is the internet home of Mark Lisanti, a Los Angeles writer sometimes known as Bunsen. He is the founding editor of Defamer, a weblog about Hollywood, where he now serves in the nebulous capacity of "editor-at-large."
If You Like Bunsen, Then You'll Love Bunsen
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