Wednesday, July 23, 2003
Some Dashes Followed by a Sequence of Obvious Nonsense
It looks as if the two-foot-eight "Mini Me" (aka Verne Troyer) is engaged to six-foot-two yoga instructor Genevieve Gallen. In other words, a freakishly short man is going to marry a woman of above-average height.
Some fret about the seemingly impossible sexual logistics of such a union. Personally, I've never had any problems being serviced by a midget, but it's usually more of a cooperative, tag-team situation. Think totem poles. OK, don't.
But relationships offering such a height juxtaposition is hardly unprecedented in Hollywood. Other stature-mismatches include:
--Morticia and Gomez Addams
--Bea Arthur and Haley Joel Osment
--Richard "Bull from 'Night Court'" Moll and the psychic from "Poltergeist"
--Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman
--Lurch and VICKI from "A Small Wonder"
--The dog from "Frasier" and Gentle Ben
--the Colossus of Rhodes and Elizabeth Taylor
--Anyone and Michael J. Fox
--Brooke Shields and one of those legless Mexican kids on a skateboard
Now perhaps you will leave Verne and Genevieve alone as they try and plan their wedding, which my sources hint will include best man Michael Clarke Duncan wearing a baby harness.