Wednesday, July 10, 2002
What to Believe In When There is Nothing Left to Believe In Section
Right Now, Let's Just Take It One Day at a Time
Van Halen, Bertinelli Split
Hasselhoff in Rehab
If you had told me a mere two months ago that by the end of the summer, Sammy Hagar and David Lee Roth would unite for a concert tour, and that Eddie Van Halen and Valerie Bertinelli would be splitzville...well, I think you know where this is going. Diamond Dave and The Red Rocker/The Guy With a Thousand Songs About Tequila can somehow squeeze onto the same stage and rock out...but Eddie and Valerie can't continue to raise Wolfie under one roof? The car door of the cosmos is certainly ajar today.
And then you're going to tell me that Hasselhoff is not only on the sauce, but that he's trying to bat the monkey off his back with one of those red floatie things? Somone signal the guard tower! Mitch fell off the flotilla!
I need something to believe in.