Tuesday, June 18, 2002
Bunsen's TV Minute: MTV Rules Reality Roost
MTV, fresh off the surprising, runaway success of "The Osbournes," introduces "Brandy: Special Delivery," which chronicles the crossover star's pregnancy from conception through to her baby's birth. The show was a fascinating look at the entire reproductive cycle, but I found the close-up, steadicam views of the penetration that produced the actual fertilization to be amateuirsh and cliche, and, perhaps predictably, there was no money-shot. Video footage revealed Brandy's husband to be an uninspired lover, finishing his business quickly and rolling over for a nap while his swimmers worked their magic deep inside his wife's cervical cavity. Fine in-utero camerawork revealed that Spermatozoa #1,563,993 finished nearly six-hundred lengths ahead of its nearest competitor in the race to the egg. And in the biggest surprise of the show, Brandy gives birth to an abandoned Cambodian girl. Compelling TV the MTV way.
Next Tuesday on the 10-Spot
"Inside R. Kelly's Big Black Van." MTV's reality crew tracks R&B supastar R. Kelly as he cruises the neighborhoods of Los Angeles in search of fresh, new talent. In the series' premeire episode, the cameras capture R. as he hangs out in the parking lot of Hollywood High, taking candid videos of eager fans as he shows them the tricked-out interior of his phat Cadillac Escalade. No access has been barred--viewers can watch as R. shows eager students the rubber zebra-pattern sheets on the rotating circular bed in the back of his ride, his impressive lollipop collection, and features snippets from R.'s home movies. Catch this one when it drops, yo!